This is why we have parents.
And if you can’t yet grab hold of your parents.
This is why we have grandparents.
You may not want to listen. You may want to discover this world alone and on your own. But if you do, you’ll be doing it the hard way, because your parents and your grandparents have wisdom to share with you.
Imagine they have been where you have been.
There is no stone unturned.
They have seen it all, felt it all, experienced it all.
They have walked, where you have walked.
Let me paint this picture for you.
Every barrier you overcome, your parents are right there. But not for the reasons you think.
See you think something else. You think they are against you? Why do you think this?
Because for so long you have thought you need to prove something to them, or make something of yourself to make them proud of you, in order to love you the way you want to be loved. If only I did x then they’d be off my back and leave me alone and finally realise..... I’m capable.... I’m enough....
Well I’m going to propose that for so long you have got it wrong.
Your parents gave birth to you and you were already perfect, in each and every way. There could be nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with you!
How then would this change over time? You are still absolutely perfect exactly the way you are and the way you aren’t.
What happens is that you forget that you chose your parents and grandparents. You specifically chose them to guide you in this thing called life.
Just imagine with me you had a buffet of choices and you chose. This gives you a whole new perspective because you realise you are not at the effect of life.
You ARE life.
You are a piece of your parents.
You are a piece of your grandparents.
They have the honour and privilege of raising you, of teaching you, of guiding you. Maybe they didn’t do these things the way you wanted them to? But they did and they do, if you could search in your heart, the ways they did and the ways they do.
See the barriers you place before yourself, are your barriers. When you strive to overcome a barrier, your parents or grandparents only want the best for YOU.
So they’ll share everything they know about helping you to overcome that barrier, whether you want to hear it or not.
But when you listen from now on. Listen from a place of acknowledgement. Of wonder at their life.
See your parents and your grandparents as a movie to watch. Don’t see them as the villains but rather as the heroines of their individual movies.
When you take on this perspective, you’ll start to see that they had their own barriers to overcome. You’ll start to see them as YOU.
I am you.
You are me.
You’ll start to see that although their barriers weren’t/aren’t quite the same as yours, they have a story to tell you that is so important for your life journey.
If you’re like me who missed out on hearing their grandparents life journey in person, you have to find a way to fill the gaps. That became the purpose and meaning in my life. To discover the story of my family of shopkeepers.
Remember, what you resist, persists. That means if you’re resisting your parents/grandparents, they will persist.
There is a mirror for you to look through and see. If only you used it the way it was intended - they are your GPS through this thing called life.
Start listening from deep within your heart. Dont interpret or analyse what they say, just take it as it comes. Their only intention in the world after giving birth to you is to be proud of you exactly as you are and exactly as you aren’t.
You are a piece of me.
I am you.
You are me.
If you allow this to sink in, you’ll soon realise that whatever pain you’re going through, they are right there with you. They want to shield you, but they also know that this life will throw you lessons that are meant for you.
I always say I’m privileged to live my life in honour of my grandparents. While they may be gone. I’m still here. I’ll do my best to uphold the life they created for us all. They made so many sacrifices and they went through so much struggle, and now I get to live the life they fought so hard for us all to have.
You chose them. You chose this life.
Hi my name is Angela. I have loved writing since I was able to hold a pencil in my hand. I soon learnt I had a gift of connecting with my ancestors through writing before my 30th birthday.